Meow Bits Madness [Mappy/Namco]

MAPPY, GORO, THE MEWKIES, AND MAPICO ARE COPYRIGHTS TO NAMCO, EPOCH, DEMPA SHUNBUNSHA, AND NINTENDO!!! AND I, THEREFORE, AM ANNOUNCING AN APOLOGY TO THOSE!





Mappyland, as usual, always has cat problems. It may look peaceful and happy to live in, like most places in the world, it has problems of its own. Not about the economy, not about depravation by war, none of those things. Just only problems with cats. Namely, Goro and his Mewkies! That brute and his gang always go about, committing crimes and always have mice in hot water. Sounds like that familiar cliche concept, "CAT AND MOUSE CHASE", doesn't it?

Well.....

For one fellow, Mappy, he always was the one on the job. That albino mouse with blue eyes always go after those cats in his everyday Micro Police attire. Same light blue shirt with his sheriff badge, belt, dark blue pants, and his officer cap. They were all for what makes Mappy the law. He always has issues with Goro and the Mewkies as well. They always manage elude him while stealing things like a Mona Lisa painting, a computer, a tube TV set, a heavy safe, and a shuffle radio. He always bounces on trampolines and zooms door to door, there was no break on this frenzy. He may manage to get all the stuff back to their rightful owners, but the one thing he wants most is seeing those darn cats behind bars! He can't stand another shift dealing with the same problem. Just recalling that unbearably sly mug of Goro: red, oranage, pink eyebrows (or maybe black) in a black tux-like shirt with a yellow-and-pink collar and has that white square on the front of his shirt. He can't stand seeing that crook. The cute looking pink and orange-striped kittens with blue scarfes, which are the Mewkies, they don't give him the most burden like Goro does. It was Goro, who was the main target for him.

When will Mappy ever get them? Well, something happened just some time ago....

One night, Goro and 3 mewkies were planning on breaking into Mapico's house. After breaking in and sneaking around, they come across her family jewels and steal them. They're about to make their way out until...

"Hey!"

The cats turned around and then the lights went up. There was Mapico in her lovely nightwear with a cute collar. She has some pink hair rollers on her head while her weary eyes shrunk from her peers. She had the light on and gasp to see those cats stealing her family jewelry. One mewkie was carrying an armful of pearl necklaces and golden neckpieces dated 100 years before 1983. The second one was had some elegent earrings dated back in 1889 with a rising Japanese sun while having some more of her other earrings on its paw. The third one has her rings with various gems like diamonds, rubies, and emeralds. One each finger and toes, that is. For Goro, he has a sack that has all the other things that seem variable to them.

"Uh, oh..." Goro muttered under his throat. "Run for it, yeh mangy kittens!" he yelled as they dashed out of the open door. As they fled, Mapico's face flushed as she screams. "ROBBERS! BURGLARS! RUMBLE-ROUSERS!" She huffs and scurries to the nearby phone on a flower pot table. She reaches the yellow telephone, dialing 911 and reports the case.
The cats laughed as they rushed down the street with the loot. "Hey, stop you theives!" The cats froze, they knew that voice. There, standing before them was their long-time rival, Mappy. Goro smirked, not feeling intimidated. "Hey look, it's our old friend , the cheese-eating flatfoot." He said, sending everyone into a laughing fit. Mappy stood his ground. "Stealing from civilians is one thing, but stealing from my wife? That makes me mad!"

"Who? That babe?" Goro looked surprised. "How long were you married?" "1986!" Mappy answered, still upset. "Well, for a gal that is married with you for 30 years, she's still one hot mama to be with! Why married to a Micro Police officer who couldn't even capture us even once? She must've married to a loser!" The cats laughed. By this, Mappy couldn't take it anymore. "That is it!" He yelled, pointing his baton at them, "You're under arrest for not only robbery, but for such display of contempt of cop!"

"Maybe after this, we should invite that lovely mouse over for tea!" Goro taunted once more as they all dashed the other way. Mappy went onto his feet and begins to chase them. Benny-Hill-like music plays in the background as they chased each other across town, with cartoon gags like misdirection, disguises and hurting each other. This goes on for a while until Mappy starts to tire out.


He was slowing down, panting while dragging his feet and hunching down a bit. "Doggone those cats," he wheezed, "I haven't seen them this fast and crafty after that big robbery of 1983." He placed his hand on the glass window, trying to catch his breath. "To be honest, I haven't been athletic as I used to..." he added. He then throws his baton on the ground with such frustration.

CLACK!

"What am I going to do!?" he asked himself. "If I return empty-handed, Mapico would be so disappointed of me! She probably won't be considered as mine after this. What will I do?" He stood there, thinking. He stops and leans against a window. Looking inside, he saw a box of Purrfecto's Meow Bits. The picture on the front showed a happy looking cat replacing the letter 'O' in 'Meow'. The motto stated: "Tastes so good, cats ask for it by name!" That gave him an idea.

"Hm......" he thought. "If I can't get them, then I'll have to get them to come to me." He notices that it was still open since it won't closed until another hour like midnight. He enters inside as a sound of a cash register was heard.

Just then, we look back and see that Goro and his Mewkies were in some alley, laughing. They still possess all the jewelry heirlooms as they were on the ground for now. "Well done, my Mewkies." he congratulate his minions. "Old Officer Cheddarbreath is losing too much breath to even catch us." "Yeah," one Mewkie agreed in a gruffy voice. "I bet he'll have to go on a diet after this!" They all laughed. "Well, we're almost close to home," he informs them. "Once we reach home, we'll sell them and plan a visit back to that babe's house for tea...." he smiled.

However, out of nowhere, they heard a familiar jingle. They also smelled something familiar. They even heard what sounded like treats being shaken in a cardboard box. Curiously, they peered into the alley and gasped in shock at what they saw. Mappy, again, standing with a box of Meow Bits in hand while playing the jingle in his portable radio at the holster of his belt. The radio played those simple verses, and "meows" while he shakes the box of cat food.

"Oh, no...." Goro muttered frantically. "Not Purrfecto's MEOW BITS....." His extremities quiver as his face sweats. He fears the one thing that dreads him the most, especially when it comes to tried avoidance of the law: TEMPTATION. He stands up, trying hard to resist.

"Mewkies, whatever you do, don't look at the box and walk away..." He told them. The Mewkies are trying their best to not succumb. They strain themselves by fleeing to the alley and try to carry their treasure. While they try to collect all of their loot, that rattle was heard again. They all stood with frizzed tails and turned around.

Mappy was nigh, rattling that box while that tune was still playing. "Don't you love turkey? Salmon? And Chicken? You know you do! So crunchy and meaty all at the same time." He was crooning those delicious details of the flavors. The cats sweat as willpower was fading away.

Sadly, the Mewkie, who has the necklaces, succumbed. His eyes swirled like a hypnotizing wheel as he walks towards Mappy like a zombie. He dropped his treasure and meowed the melody of that tune while having his paws in the air, trying to reach for the box.

"Gunner.....!" Goro called out that Mewkie, shocked to see him all given in.

He turns at his side and notice that cat with the earrings dropped his treasure and has those earrings on his ears off. His eyes were swirling, too. "Decker, not you, too!" Yes, he gave in and walks toward Mappy.

Another Mewkie, Jingles, removed the rings from his fingers and toes and walked over to Mappy. Goro stared in shock as Mappy grinned ear to ear.

"You may have allured my Mewkies with that betraying box, but you won't let me give in!" Goro hisses at the proud and sly mouse. "I've tasted cat food before! But at the same time, I know how to perform willpower! Even if it kills me!"

"Do you really?" Mappy responded, feeling so pleased and crafty. "I never knew a big, tough cat burglar would learn about self control. In that case...." He begins to open the open. Goro's eyes shrunk, gulped nervously. He pulled out a fish-shaped bit, asking the Mewkies, "Who wants one?"

"Me! Me! Me!"

"No, me!"

"Me want!"

There was a hubbub from those cats, begging for that food. Goro's body was shaking up. He sweats all around. His tails frizzes from remaining such willpower.

Don't give in, Goro! That crook thought to himself, Don't betray yourself over some stupid cat food! He stars at that piece which was still out of the cats reach. His heart beats faster than ever. He felt like he's gonna pass out from this. He tries to ignore it, but it was too overbearing...

MUST.....NOT....GIVE....IN......ON.....

Then, his mind snapped and his eyes swirled as he relaxed. He then walks up to it like a hypnotized zombie. "Meow Bits..." he muttered. Mappy noticed that they are all now hooked on the stuff and he held the box out of their reach. "If you guys want this so bad, follow me!" He ordered as he lead them out of the alley, the cats following along. "Sing that song." he commanded and they began meowing the melody. As they do, Mappy thought to himself, 'I should've thought of this ages ago...'

While he was leading the way, with that Meow Bits box up in the air with one hand, the other hand has a walkie talkie. "902, 902....I got the culprits at my hands at last, using Meow Bits. Stolen treasure, neglected in an alley at 1955 East Nakamura Drive, return to owner as soon as possible. Now heading to the jailhouse." He hangs up by the time they were nearing the prison with the entrance open.


Later, we see the cats in a jail cell, still hypnotized as an unseen officer tossed a big bag of Meow Bits in with them. "Here ya go, ya scumbags! No fighting, y'hear?" The cats ended up ravaging through the bag like crazy cats. Mappy watches them, scarfing down the cat food, laughing. "I had to say, more than 30 years of trying to catch you, I am pleased to finally see you here." Before he walked out, he added, "I know you'll probably try to break out soon, so maybe I should try finding new flavors of those Meow Bits, see you around." He added another chuckle as he walked out. "Maybe some seafood flavor...." we hear him spoke once more.

- THE END -